People have a thing for birthdays. Most would celebrate the birthdays of others and some will go to great lengths to celebrate their own. I've been to some pretty epic birthday bashes and I generally had great fun celebrating. It is, of course, a major day for most people in their lives. Most would love to celebrate their birthdays with family and friends and would certainly look forward to it.
I, on the other hand, have grown up not really having a close idea of celebrating my own. For the first decade or so, birthdays have always been celebrated with family. For good reason too. Back then, school starts in December, which meant that we have our month long school holidays in November. That is usually a time that we would travel to Penang, which is where my parents were born and where most of my relatives lived. So I celebrated my birthday there. I remember the times that my birthday were held at fast food joints like McDonalds or A&W because that was considered as a well accepted place to celebrate your birthday. Especially when you are a kid.
The following two decades or so after that changed. Back then there was a major change such that school starts in January and so the month long holidays are in December. This meant that the end of the year exams were in November. And so the rest of my birthdays were celebrated at home, with my parents and my sister. Followed by stern warnings of going back to study for the exams. And so as time passes by, the thought of celebrating my birthday diminishes into almost nothingness. I've gotten to the point that my birthday is just another ordinary day. I haven't gotten to the point of forgetting my own birthday (although I do know a person who sometimes does that) but I certainly lived as though I did.
So even to my working days, I don't really celebrate my own birthday. I don't even tell people my birthday anymore unless severely prompted. I've managed to hide my birthday even from my community group for the 2.5 years that I have been in. I like the quiet and have grown accustomed to it.
This year however, was a little different. One thing led to another and that led to a lot more people figuring out my birthday (and you might have guessed that it has something to do with hedgehogs). And with the recent sermon at church on friendship, it has forced me to reevaluate my current position of not letting people know about my birthday, even to my friends. I've always take the position of being the passive one in the friendship and granted that I have lost quite a few a long the way because of that. I think it is about time that I know the joy of an active friendship.
That should be this decade's resolution.
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Having being in the cross-fire of a relationship triangle is no fun at all. I can't decide which is worse, being in a relationship triangle or being the middleman to all three people in the triangle.
Even worse, I'm the armchair theorist. I have zero good advice because I have zero experience.
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